Sunday, December 30, 2001

It hasn't been a great couple of weeks, what with one thing and another. I don't like the season much, anyway - I keep assuming it's about goodwill, and get sarcastic and cynical, that it seems more about greed - then suddenly it is me who is the grump, and all this jolliness and spending seems to count as near enough to real 'goodwill' for most people.

Whatever. I tried to be a bit better about it. Didn't succeed. Still, there is only the New Year's Eve 'jollities' to get through. That's on the local calendar - but I'd better not get into that rant just now. Suffice to say, it's just a Tuesday to me. And even that is ludicrous...what possible difference is there between the days of the week - that doesn't involve weather?

It's harder to sustain these attitudes these days. Of course it was easier when I had full control of my life in the self-employed way...Nowadays I have to pay more attention to the local mental models - and social constructs.

Is he rambling? Yes he is.

Anyway, I found the culprit software that was chewing up resources, even when not in use. And moved my Swap file around to speed things up. The trip to Hawaii is INSTEAD of buying a new computer (this one is two years old now), so I have to do a bit of tuning and maintenance to nurse the poor old slowcoach PC along.

Have a great time in the next few months (if you can) - enjoy your festivals (whatever your beliefs) - and goodwill and best wishes from a freethinker to all people with kindness in their hearts. Take Care out there.

Monday, December 10, 2001

It has been a long time since I posted. I don't know quite why. Winter blues, being busy, the desire to hibernate [my version of S.A.D.] and various other elements of my life.

The chronic pain business is still getting me down - and now it's that miserable season of goodwill. Oh sorry, I mean I quite like the idea of goodwill to all, and generosity to others - but I hate the quasi-religion, the commercialism, the sentimentality, the Saturnalia [now known as the office party] - the fact that poverty feels worse at Christmas, just as homelessness does [especially with all the mortgage owners going on about being born in a barn], and the drink driving goes up [and death of a loved one feels worse at Xmas, too.]

So, have a good time. Personally all I can do is grit my teeth and get through it one more time. The only time I spare a moment to notice it isn't just any old Tuesday will be when I raise a glass to W.C.Fields, the old curmudgeon who managed to die on Christmas Day.

Here's to Bill.
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